Our government negotiating with the Japanese reminds me of F Troop.

I am sure you remember the show, too, at least from reruns.

Sergeant O’Rourke (Forrest Tucker) and Corporal Agarn (Larry Storch) had a side business going with the Heckawis, actors whose names I forget, but they weren’t really Native American.

The gag was that even though the fort was out in the old American west to defend against the Indians, O’Rourke had “O’Rourke Enterprises” going as business, trading with Chief Wild Eagle and Crazy Cat. Agarn was the partner.

Whatever O’Rourke was up to on the business side, he made sure that U.S. government policy, pursued through Fort Courage (the base of F Troop) did not get in the way. O’Rourke collected from the U.S. government, and he did his deals with the Indians. It was funny.

When you listen to our government in its dealings with the Japanese government, and you’ve lived there and know a thing or two, it sounds like O’Rourke and the Heckawis. They can’t get the abducted children back, they can’t get American workers covered in the right pension and health care programs–if any at all. Never mind adequate protections under the Japanese Labor Standards Act. They can’t even agree to clean service of process when the process is being sent to Japan (i.e. the other Hague treaty issue).

When O’Rourke is playing Captain Parmenter for a fish, every time he says something along the lines of “but, sir, what about the Heckawis”, I just go “ahhhh, yes”.

You clearly see that it’s more about O’Rourke Enterprises getting taken care of, than it is about Fort Courage doing what it’s supposed to do.

How come when these State Department, Defense Department, and entrenched business interests started making the same sounds, it isn’t looked at in the same, situation-comedy way?